Why do I let myself imagine this?

OK, so first of all I'm a 14 year old boy...who likes other boys (I'm GAY) and I'm closeted. I sometimes have these day dreams when I am with a really hot guy (who looks like my crush, Brent Corrigan) and I am holding him while he lies on my chest, while I stroke through his hair while we talk about how much we love each other. Why do I let myself do this to myself? It makes me so depressed that I don't have a boyfriend to have a mutual relationship with and it makes me even sadder that I don't have any friends to share my secret with. I've actually haven't accepted that I'm gay since Easter day, but I thought I was Bi for many years now. Do most gay men do this? Is it the equivalent to a female dreaming about Justin Beiber, or whoever chicks like? PLZ help! 10 pts!